Rule for dating my son
It is my job to teach my son responsibility and self-respect, and prepare him to make his own well-informed decisions.
Sweetie, you will not ask him to take you on any little side trips to anywhere, especially the mall, where he will be expected to tag along after you as you use him first as your personal chauffeur, then as your bearer for your packages. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with breasts hanging out, and looking like you are trying out for a job with Hugh Heffner, and I will not object.
I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROC UTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.
_________________________________________________________Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!
______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________In 50 words or less, what does ' ABSTINENCE' mean to you? __________ SHORT-ANSWER SECTION: Answer by filling in the blank.
I HIGHLY SUGGEST RUNNING AS I AM A DAMNED GOOD SHOT.) ESSAY SECTION: In 50 words or less, what does ' LATE' mean to you ______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________In 50 words or less, what does ' DON' T TOUCH MY SON' mean to you?
Hence, he is not an object for you to play with, manipulate, and discard at your leisure.